The Mindset Flip: Your Ultimate Growth Mindset Tool

Last week, we learned about fixed mindset and how to spot it - and you took time to identify moments where you were experiencing fixed mindset thinking.

Identifying when you're in fixed mindset is a critical skill for learning how to put yourself into what I call "Growth Mindset Mode."

Growth Mindset Mode is when you're sincerely committed to the belief that with training, time, and practice, you can improve at X. 

This is because Growth Mindset Mode requires A LOT out of you. It is not, as we discussed last week, about positive thinking.  When you enter into Growth Mindset Mode, you are making a commitment to yourself (and others) regarding something you plan to improve and to doing the things it takes on a consistent basis to get there.  You can't just think "I can be a better parent" or "I can improve my public speaking skills."  Growth Mindset Mode requires that you have a plan to improve and that you do the work over the period of time it takes to achieve your goal.

Why Identifying Fixed Mindset is Important to Growth Mindset Mode

Changing behavior is hard.  We all know this.  The road to many a failure or disappointment has been paved with good intentions.

It is inevitable that you will encounter setback after setback when trying to change your behavior or improve at a skill. This is because growth and development is not a linear process. When you're trying to improve at something, it is often two steps forward and one step back.

This is a highly frustrating process.  Our expectations are of a linear and progressive path to growth ("I get a little bit better after every tennis lesson").  But the reality is not linear ("I get better, than I find myself backsliding in the next lesson.")

And it's precisely at that moment - the divide between our expectations and our reality - where most people get stuck and give up.

 But not YOU.  You won't give up because when you encounter the inevitable setbacks on the path to growth - when you find yourself in fixed mindset thinking - you will pause, and you will stop for as long as you need to, so you can flip yourself back into Growth Mindset Mode - where you stick to the plan and do the work.

 This is what I call the "Growth Mindset Flip" - and it works exactly as the name indicates.  When you have identified a fixed mindset thought or have uttered a fixed mindset sentence (or a fixed mindset paragraph, as I tend to) you will stop that thought in its tracks as quickly as you can and flip yourself back into Growth Mindset Mode.

 (For me, those thoughts can become runaway trains so it takes a little time and momentum to get that train back on track. Don't worry if it takes you a while to flip your mindset - just keep working on it and you will be surprised at how much faster you become with time and practice.)

Remember, keeping yourself in Growth Mindset Mode takes effort. You will consistently encounter fixed mindset thinking and will need to flip yourself back into Growth Mindset Mode on the path to reaching your growth and development goal.

 This is true not only of tennis, but of any skill. Whether you want to be a better public speaker, a more present parent, a more patient partner, a better leader for your team - - it all takes time, training, practice, and growth mindset.

 How to flip from fixed mindset to Growth Mindset Mode?  Here are a few examples:

Fixed Mindset: I really lost my temper during that last team meeting.  I'm working on staying cool and collected - and I was able to do that last week - but this week? I lost it.  Why am I even bothering with this? There's too much riding on this deal to stay calm.  I mean, it's ok to be "passionate" right?

Mindset Flip: I really lost my temper during that last meeting. It's important to me to stay collected right now because so much is riding on this deal and I know that when I lose my temper it discourages my team. I know that if I stick to my plan to improve my temper I will eventually be able to stay calm more often than not.  I will practice my emotional agility exercises this week in less stressful situations so that I can do a better job utilizing them at the next all-team meeting.

Fixed Mindset: That presentation did not go well.  I thought I was prepared but they asked me questions I'd never considered before.  Not to mention I was nervous and they could tell.  Why did I say yes to giving this presentation?  Everyone knows my public speaking skills are terrible and I'm not good thinking on my feet.  I need to stick to what I'm good at. 

Mindset Flip: That presentation did not go as I had expected. I did everything I could to prepare but they asked me questions that I'd not considered.  This is a learning opportunity for me - those questions can help me learn what's important to my audience.  I'll sit with their questions for a while. I’ll pull out insights so that my next presentation will answer those questions and so that I'm addressing more of the things they want to learn about.  I was really nervous but everyone gets nervous!  I'll learn to channel my nerves with more time and experience.

Ok, it’s YOUR turn - what’s your growth mindset flip?